Love Sick: The Importance of Being Over It

Today we get a little personal in the Love Sick column. Somewhat recently I dated someone for a short while before eventually realizing that they just didn’t quite do it for me. I felt terrible for letting them get so emotionally involved in the relationship before I realized my lack of affection and cut it short.

I had to work with this person on a daily basis, so I attempted to continue to be friendly with the person, while trying to show them that the relationship was over. I knew that they were still not over the relationship, which became especially apparent when they completely ignored me at a co-worker dinner.

This was understandable behavior to me until a few days later I discovered they were in a relationship with someone new. I was appalled. This person, who had just recently told me they were still not over me and were having a hard time getting over the relationship was foraging into a new one? Worst idea ever.

Not only do I feel sorry for this new girl but also fear for their relationship. I would love for them to work out and be happy, but getting into a new relationship while still holding onto an old one is never a good idea. When you are dating someone, all of your feelings should be focused on them, and not lingering on to anyone else. You can’t start a new relationship while getting over an old one because you will still be holding on to too much baggage, which could be detrimental to this new coupling.

It’s important to enter all relationships with an open heart and a clear head. You won’t fully enjoy being with someone new if you’re still thinking about someone from the past. And it’s not fair to the new person you’re dating because they deserve your full love and attention. It’s only after you can come to a place where you can look at a past relationship and not feel heart-sick that you are ready to jump into a new one.